Tag Archives: handbag

Essex Girls Like Bags…

20120612 Lakeside Shopping Centre Essex Handbag Face 150x150 Essex Girls Like Bags...

..all generalisations are true and 47.4% of all statistics are made up by illegal aliens like me.  I love it when people send me emails with pictures and this week has been Essex Galore.  This photograph was sent in by sisters Jen and Sal, who were out shopping at the Lakeside Shopping Centre in Essex.  It depicts a handbag face, rather like the one taken in France in the post Fluorescothugs Suck Bags, but this one is rather more “laid back and couldn’t really give a hoot about things” in the words of Jen and Sal.  Great spot, ladies!  More from Essex up next.

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Fluorescothugs suck bags

20110818 French handbag face 150x150 Fluorescothugs suck bags

Trying to organise things can suck bags.  Some people will ignore emails or texts and some many will be available on a given day.  I used to organise a lot of things but have taken a bit of a back seat in recent months (until about a week ago), as I have been so damned busy.

Can you believe it’s August already?  I’m looking out the window and it’s cold and dark.  When I was in Chippenham earlier I could smell autumn in the air and we haven’t even had the August bank holiday yet!  Remember the two weeks of summer we had back in April?  They were predicting a hot August and possible drought.  Fortunately I had a nice long weekend in southern France not too long ago.


The holiday to southernFrancewas the last thing I co-organised and I am currently in the process of organising yet another holiday and some other little projects on the side.  Once everyone has replied to the respective “projects” I’m sure it will be great, but as I alluded to above it can be a pretty frustrating process.

The holiday in France (Montpellierand Béziers) was fantastic.  We went for a long weekend and had a great time absorbing some culture and swimming in theMediterranean Sea.  There were loads of topless women sunbathing on the beach.  I am quite proud of myself for actually swimming in theMediterranean Sea– the most polluted sea in the word (I believe), which I can now note down in my book of achievements.  All in all, it was a pretty awesome holiday.  Did I mention the topless women…?

The face in the bag

Whilst in MontpellierI spotted a handbag it in a shop window that appeared to have a face in it.  The shop was quite posh looking and was in Le Polygone shopping centre.  I didn’t particularly want to take a picture of a shop window, deterred by my bad experiences with “officials” in Britain (or as I call them fluorescothugs – give anyone a fluorescent jacket and they think they are God.)  My friend Liam took the picture for me and he had a superior camera on his phone anyway.  It was photography by proxy induced by fear.  I call it photophoboproxography.


As an avid photographer I was openly taking pictures at Cribbs Causeway a few years ago and was putting myself through awkward physical contortions to get a slightly better composition.  I call it yogatography.  It should have been clear to any imbecile that I was a jihadi – erm, sorry, a photographer.  Nonetheless I was approached by some thugs riding a converted golf buggy (too lazy to walk), which looked a bit like the Pope Mobile.  When asked what I was doing, I was tempted to reply, “It’s called photography.  Do you simple folk have that?  Look, it’s a magic little light box!  Woooo…”

I decided it wasn’t worth my breath and followed them into a little room around the back of the shopping centre to receive a severe beating – sorry, I mean a “permit”.  It was just some lame piece of paper that I could have knocked up myself but it made those sad small people happy for a split second.  Give anyone a fluorescent jacket and they think they are God.  Fluorescothugs.

On a lighter note, did I mention there were loads of topless women on the beach inFrance?

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Reader Submission: Nick

Handbag 150x150 Reader Submission: NickBox Face 150x150 Reader Submission: NickThese pictures were submitted by Nick.  Both are quite abstract, but if you stare long enough you’ll see a face in both pictures.  It’s a bit like Magic Eye… maybe… 🙂  Stare for a bit longer, and you can see into the past… not really – more than likely you’ll just end up with eye strain.

Thanks for the submission, Nick!  Remember folks, communication works two ways; this is an interactive site, so don’t be shy!

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Bag lady

20101016 Handbag 300x225 Bag ladyI looked at my friend’s handbag in the pub the other and noticed it staring back at me. Its lips look wrinkled, rather like an elderly lady. Bag + Lady = Bag Lady. What else can I say?

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