Tag Archives: nbsp

Why I hate humans

20130217 Wooden Box Coffee Table Face 150x150 Why I hate humansGideon from Amsterdam (ja, Amshterdam for shure, for shure) sent in this picture of a wooden box-cum-coffee table.¬† The box isn’t looking very happy with all that crap piled onto its back.¬† Humans are the biggest bullies on the planet and use anything and everything for their own benefit with no regard for the feelings of others.¬† Look at me: I’m an enslaved¬†Vaxian, but I can’t complain; at least I get fed… sometimes.

Here’s a further list of why I hate humans: global warming, slave trade, deforestation, cheating partners,¬†girlfriend or date snogging someone else,¬†bankers stealing from their fellow humans…¬† Actually, the latter is debatable, as rich bankers with their dirty bonuses aren’t really human…¬† Anyway, there’s a picture of a box…

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Does Marzipan Count Towards Your Five a Day?

20130107 Marzipan Fruit Face 150x150 Does Marzipan Count Towards Your Five a Day?Hello!¬† Happy new year to you!¬† Is it too late to wish you a happy new year?¬† It’s certainly too late to ask you if it’s too late to do so, as I’ve already done it.¬† Confused?¬† Yeah, me too.¬† My little plastic brain hurts.

So, this website’s best friend Jen sent in another picture. It’s a box of fruity marzipan she got from her sister Sal.¬† Whilst it looks delicious, it certainly doesn’t count towards your five a day… in terms of fruit and vegetables at least.¬† On my planet the Vaxian government’s advice is to suck up 5 portions of sugar a day.¬† At least that’s what it was when I left my home planet and before I crash landed on your blue sphere.¬† I bet it’s all changed now…¬† Remember to brush your teeth, kids.¬† I’m lucky I don’t have teeth.¬† They got knocked out of my mouth when I crashed…¬† Right, I’m going to go back to doing nothing now.¬† Byeee!

 

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