Tag Archives: royal wedding

Lord of the Pies

20110427 Demonic Cornish Pasty 150x150 Lord of the Pies

Bought sandwiches are full of fat and are expensive.  But is there a convenient way to eat healthy food?

A couple of days ago I wrote about the Royal Wedding (Kate someone and Bill something or other… 😉 ) and mentioned the variety of memorabilia that are on sale, which included sick bags and pies.  A close cousin of the pie is the pasty.  They are both pastry-based foodstuffs, yet they look different.  And I have just caught myself unnecessarily increasing the word count of this article by stating the bleeding obvious.  I call it nihilwafflication.

There is a nice pasty shop on the high street in the town in Wiltshire where I work. Their pasties are delicious, albeit a bit expensive.  I had a sudden craving for them recently, possibly to do with the sudden change in temperature.


Have you ever noticed how your appetite for certain foods varies with the seasons and the weather?  Maybe not, but I for one don’t find fresh fruit and vegetables particularly appealing in the winter or when it is cold.  Perhaps this is because vegetables, like cucumbers and tomatoes (technically not a vegetable but a fruit), are kept in the fridge and make you feel cold.

People often speak of good and bad foods, but surely no food is that bad if eaten in moderation.  Pies and pasties are definitely not foods I would eat every day, as they are not just bad for you but actually evil.  More on this later…

Packed lunch

I have recently taken to making my own lunch again after a prolonged period of buying ready made sandwiches, sushi, pasta, pasties and other such expensive junk.  This is mostly in a drive to eat more healthily and as an added bonus, it is cheaper.  Most bought sandwiches contain shocking amounts of fat, usually in the form of mayonnaise and some actually contain more calories than a Big Mac (although interestingly the calorific value of the latter varies by country).  I recently read McDonald’s were paying rappers for dropping the word “Big Mac” into their “songs”.  So, Mr Kroc (he’s dead, I know), that’ll be £100 please.  Paypal preferred! 😉

Yesterday I was talking to my colleague about the nuisance of making packed lunches and he told me his secret.  He usually buys bread, cheese and peanut butter (I did question the combination, but apparently it is delicious) and makes one humongous batch of sandwiches out of the entire loaf, putting them all back in the original bag and freezing the lot.  Apparently if you take out your day’s lunch in the morning it will be defrosted by lunchtime.  The only drawback is that you can’t have cucumber or any other vegetables whose cell membranes are ruptured in the freezer.  But there’s nothing stopping you slicing fresh cucumber and adding it on the day.  This has the added benefit that your bread doesn’t go soggy.

So there you have it, free culinary tips dispensed by John (not his real name) to Vic, to you.  Who’d have thunk it!  Is there nothing Vic Suckerbag won’t do? 

Lord of the Pies

This bad boy in the photograph is a delicious Cornish Pasty – or it might even have been a steak and stilton pasty.  Whatever it was, it is now a part of me.  Reiterating what I said above, it is not a bad food – nay, it is pure evil: it is one bad-ass mo fo!  Forget the Lord of the Flies, this is the evil Lord of the Pies.  Eat too many and they will haunt you and cling onto you, only to let go after vigorous exercise. 

Anyone for a frozen cheese and peanut butter sandwich?

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Helga: The face that made a thousand ice-creams

20110425 Smiling ice cream maker lid 150x150 Helga: The face that made a thousand ice creams

It’s been a hot Easter here in the south-west of England and it’s come and gone for another year.

Easter has come and gone for another year and what a fantastic one it was; the weather was absolutely gorgeous and I managed to sneak in a couple of picnics.  Because of poor planning on my part I had already eaten before I turned up on both occasions but enjoyed the sunshine, the company and watching others eat: a picnic by proxy perhaps, or a proxnic.

With the Royal Wedding next week (that’s Kate Middleton and Prince William, I think…), those clever enough to have planned ahead would be benefiting from 11 days off in a row right now.  Unfortunately because of meetings I’m working this week, but it should be a fairly easy three-days.  I am banking on the fact that a lot of other people will be off and my inbox won’t be flooded with emails from people screaming information they needed “yesterday”.  You know, if only they (whoever they are) planed better they wouldn’t be panicking all the time… hey ho.

A lot of teachers will have to go back in for three days, but they will have had two weeks off, it being half term and all that.  My colleague’s fiancée is a teacher and I think she will only have worked three days in April.  I’m not entirely sure how that works…

 Chocolaty badness

So, did you gorge yourself on Easter eggs and other chocolaty badness?  I’m pleased to say I didn’t and this whole commercialisation malarkey seems to have passed me by.  I have been incredibly busy at work and I had almost forgotten it was Easter, were it not for the fact that someone reminded me.  Egg stocks at Asda had gone suspiciously low by Thursday evening, too, which was a dead giveaway.

Speaking of commercialisation, a lot of companies are taking advantage of the Royal wedding on Friday, selling all sorts of commemorative merchandise from sick bags to pies and beyond.  Good or bad?  Either way it means we get another four-day weekend – yay!


The weather has been unseasonably warm for April and the last time I remember it being this warm around this time of the year was 1999.  But that probably tells you more about my selective memory than anything else!  Hopefully the weather will hold out; it would be nice to have a nice long summer.  But before we get our hopes up, remember the barbecue summer that was forecast for the year before last?  Whatever happened to that?

Helga: The face that made a thousand ice-creams

The item in the photograph is an ice-cream maker lid and actually belongs to an old flatmate of a friend of mine.  I took this photograph a while back when I was at his house and have been waiting for an appropriate time to post it.

The lid is smiling, perhaps in anticipation of being used to create tonnes of ice-cream this year.  Perhaps she is smiling in contentment at the fact that she has had a productive life.  Perhaps she is Helga – the face that made a thousand ice-creams.

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