Tag Archives: tendency


20121022 Pie face 150x150 3.1415926535...Our¬†honorary London correspondent, Jen, sent in this photograph of a pie she (presumably) had for dinner.¬† She writes, “This one’s innards consists of mince beef and onion – courtesy of Asda! :-)”.¬† Her email had the number pi as the subject, which I thought was very clever for a human.¬† The only problem is that pi is wrong.¬† The more logically consistent circle constant is tau¬†and it results in cleaner formulae.¬† We Vaxians have known about this for (Vaxian) centuries and you humans have only just cottoned on to the idea.¬† Again, we laugh at your primitive intellect – not too hard though, because we have a tendency to expel clouds of dust… anyway…¬† Jen sent in another picture of a napkin holder shown below.¬† Napkins sure come in handy after you’ve just devoured a delicious pie.¬† Too bad I’m gluten intolerant.


20121022 Napkin holder dispenser face 225x300 3.1415926535...

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There was a crooked man

20110220 Crooked man letterbox face 150x150 There was a crooked manI was out with some great people yesterday and¬†learned some Makaton, would you believe.¬† I say learned, but I didn’t.¬† I was subjected to a lot of it, but hey, I have a tendency to talk with my hands a lot myself; it’s a continental thing, apparently…¬† But I never knew there was a word for¬†my “dialect” of made up sign language¬†amongst Makaton “speakers”.¬† Apparently it is termed “Mockaton”.¬† Years ago (back in the 80s), when I “were” a nipper, I watched some school television programme about sign language.¬† For reasons I¬†don’t understand (Is there a psychologist/psychiatrist in the house?)¬† I always¬†remembered the sign for “toilet” from that programme¬†– or so I thought.¬† It turns out that I had my fingers in the wrong place and made the motion of the wrong side of my chest.¬† That got me thinking.¬† To a BSL or Makaton “speaker”, how would that be interpreted?¬† Would it be the equivalent of having a lisp or maybe a crooked mouth?¬† Or would they simply not understand?¬† Hold that thought…

Speaking of a crooked mouth, do you remember that nursery rhyme “There was a crooked man”?¬† It goes like this:

There was a crooked man and he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence upon a crooked stile.
He bought a crooked cat, which caught a crooked mouse.
And they all lived together in a little crooked house

What’s that got to do with anything?¬† Well, I bloody well thought it was a good link…¬† Look at the picture – it should all make sense.¬† It’s a letterbox (I think) taken on another night out some time ago.¬† I bet you’re thinking I spend my entire life on the razz!¬† I wish…¬† The eyes and mouth are slightly misaligned and if it tried to speak it would¬†almost¬†certainly¬†sound like me trying my hand at Makaton.¬† He is the Crooked Man.

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